What Was Built In A Day, Then?

They say that Rome wasn't built in a day. First, prove it. Second, how is that supposed to make me feel any better?

Me: This project is taking forever.
Co-worker: Well, Rome wasn't built in a day.
Me: Great. It probably took them as long to build Rome as it is taking me to figure out this Excel spreadsheet. That makes me feel better. Sure.

Why are we comparing this to Rome, anyway? Beside the fact that I lack an abacus on my desk...It isn't as if the Romans are still thriving in a great way. I'm not aspiring to have people still discussing the fall of my report thousands of years later. Trust me, I have enough of that in modern day times.

When did this even become a common phrase to use? And how can we stop it? At one point, Ancient Rome was a bustling economic hub, I get it. But I can't fathom Odysseus throwing out "Rome wasn't built in a day..." lines when they were constructing a wooden horse.

Odysseus: You know, Epeius sure is taking his sweet time building that thing.
Athena: Come on dear, we all know Rome wasn't built in a day.

I imagine that the above dialogue never happened. However, it does make for a funny visual.

I'm pretty confident that nothing I will accomplish in this lifetime will equate to the building of Rome. Likewise, nothing will ever fall as hard in my life, either. So there's always that working in my favor.

So, the next time someone is working on something (save for building an actual city out of nothing) and you want to use the "Rome wasn't built in a day" line? Remember this. You may be correct (The jury is still out. I haven't seen the Facebook pictures to prove that it wasn't built in a day...) but it also only took one arrow to bring down Achilles.

I'm loading my bow right now. Just so you know.

I Did My Best ... Where's My Ribbon?

Try your best, that’s all we can ask. How many times did you hear this growing up? We never mean this, as humans. Ever. We want to mean it, I think. But we don’t.

When we say try your best we mean “just do it…oh and don’t screw up.” Your boss, at work, certainly doesn’t want you to LITERALLY only try your best. If your best isn’t good enough you’re bound to hear about it, or others around you will hear about it. Do your best is the cliché line we say when we don’t want to say “Really? You don’t know how to do this? Well…just try your best.” And then, as we walk away, we hope for the best.

Seriously, think about anytime you have used this phrase. Did you REALLY mean it? And why? Why is “your best” good enough? Shouldn’t we always strive to be doing better? To go above and beyond? To further ourselves and our knowledge? So would it hurt to say “Do your best. If it sucks, do it again. Or seek someone who can help you.”

You don’t pull up to the bank to deposit your check and say “Hey do your best at making sure my money gets into my account, and that you return correct change to me.” What if her best really WAS shorting you that five bucks? I’m not envisioning you pulling away from the bank with a simple shrug of your shoulders. “Well, she tried,” you’d say. Not believing that for an instant.

I’ve certainly never walked into a doctor’s office and hoped they “did their best” in diagnosing what is wrong with me. If they’re just going to do their best at figuring out what is wrong with me? I’m only going to do my best at paying them. Sorry, my best today was only 5 bucks.

I challenge you to say “Hey, do your best” to little Susie when you leave your kids alone with her for a night out, next time. Yeah-freaking-right. When it comes to your kid “doing your” best at taking care of them? Never acceptable, right?

“It’s okay, payroll department, I know you did your best. Don’t worry that I didn’t get a check this week.” Can you imagine ever saying this? …I doubt it! So why on Earth do we say that to people, in any instance?

This “you did your best” attitude needs to be stopped. Don’t do YOUR best, do THE best. If your best isn’t as good as it can get? Keep working at it. Why is that so hard to say? I have no problem doing so.

And I guess, if you didn’t like this blog? Too bad. I did my best.

"Follow Your Own Path"

Some of the best advice my parents ever gave me was simply to make my own path in life. Don't follow in anyone else's footsteps, they would say. Do what makes you happy. Do what you think fits you best. Break the mold!

They have eaten their words on numerous occasions. I bet if they could take back the "Follow your own path" advice? They would.

When I went away to college my father insisted that I study computer programming. It was going to be a great career, I could utilize my brain, forge a path that many females hadn't, and still punch a clock while raking in the dough. No, really, he was sure I would be swimming in money. There were (idle) threats of "You have to or we won't help you!" (yeah right, I never believed that for an instant.) There were pleas of "Come on! You have such a big brain! Use it..." I relented and decided to make that my major. Three weeks into school I also thought adding a Latin and Philosophy major was awesome. I remember the call home to tell my father.

"What the hell are you going to do with a Latin degree? You do know there aren't Romans running around looking for translators, right?"

We then switched right into Philosophy and how ridiculous it was. "They aren't hiring people to sit atop mountains and hand out advice anymore." Too bad Craiglist wasn't around I could have told him that there were some postings on Craiglist for just such a job. And I probably wouldn't be lying. Have you seen some of that wacky stuff?

Finally we moved into the last phase of his argument. "What is a computer science and programming major going to do with Latin and Philosophy? They have nothing in common!" I merely reminded him that they told me to forge my own way, make my own path, follow my own ideas, color outside the lines. He shut up. But I'm pretty sure that was because he was trying to price out flux capacitors so he could fire up the Delorean and head back to 1981 and strike the phrase "Follow your own path" from his and my mother's mouths.


Three years later, with one year left to finish said degree I can only imagine the brain damage he incurred when I informed them I decided to give up on computer programming and study Public Relations, Advertising, and Marketing. To this day my father reminds me that I could work less hours and make more money if I'd just go back and finish that last year or so of my computer programming degree. It made me miserable, I detested the idea of it and as the end of my studies got closer I just realized I couldn't do it as a living. It was painful.

But, as I reminded him, I was just making my own path in life! I didn't hear another word about it for a few weeks. But I'm fairly sure that's because he was screaming in an octave that only dogs could hear.

Most recently, I was reminded of this great advice while driving in downtown Chicago. If any of you have done so you know that it isn't always the most stress-free thing to do. I wanted to get gas before we left. My mother and best friend said "Oh no, you are fine." As we were approaching Lake Shore Drive area, we got the Low Fuel warning. We certainly weren't going to make it home, too. I decided to veer off at the gas station closest. I was impressed that I got over two lanes and pulled right up to the most outside pump. I pulled up, rolled down my window and said "Why does this look weird?" My mother yelled "Because you are on the sidewalk!"

Oops? How many of you have seen gas pumps with only one side operational? I just figured that both sides were gas pumps. Apparently, however, people frown upon you driving on the sidewalk. As we were pulling off the sidwalk I could hear my best friend gasping for air and my mother yelling (between laughs) "Don't hit anyone!" As I pulled up and around and to an actual pump, they were both almost in tears. The ride home was a constant barrage of "Whatever, you drive on sidewalks," every time I attempted to speak. My best friend took pictures, as I was pumping gas. Apparently to humiliate me. I have no shame, however. Because as we pulled into the driveway and my mom got out (proclaiming her freedom and astonishment on arriving safely because I drive on sidewalks) I just smiled and said "Hey, you told me to make my own path."

Best. Advice. Ever.

Thanks Mom and Dad!